Locker Room, No Humor

I spent the better part of the last month looking for a locker mirror. I wanted something to hang on the window divider so I could see people approaching my work station. There are few things I despise worse than the mini-heart attacks I experience when startled, so I checked the dollar stores and Wal-Marts, but nobody had a magnetic looking glass. My wife finally located one for me, and only then did I discover the metal is not magnetic.

Why would someone make metal that isn't magnetic? Isn't that the whole point of being metal?

In lieu of proper usage of this mirror, I now have to concoct some contraption to attach to my typing stand, which inevitably will be stolen/broken/ordered to be removed by management.

Last week, the higher-ups instructed us to remove all items from the lockers in the shower room. As I try to play basketball twice weekly, I need a towel and toiletries, lest the entire sixth floor over-appreciate my "athletic aura." I understand the necessity to switch out towels to make sure they're clean, fresh, and not moldy; it's been 25 years since 7th grade gym class. But it'd be nice to store my soap, shampoo, razor and deodorant in a locker. Y'know, because IT'S A LOCKER.

Apparently, the twenty lockers are there for those times twenty men simultaneously want to shower and need storage space for their belongings. (I've not been in the women's shower room, but I'm guessing they have twenty there as well.) Potential shortcoming: the locker room has only two showers. I'm not sure what the other eighteen guys will be doing, but I can safely promise if an event occurs when the line grows that long for showers, I won't be one of the men standing around in a towel. Sixth floor be damned, I'm going to skunk it up until I can shower solo. (Buried somewhere in this conundrum is a labor lawsuit.)

That's weird. The combination to my locker at Penn Wood East was 12-36-14. Basement floor, #128. While the school building no longer uses that name, I expect they haven't changed the lockers since 1984. Maybe whoever's using it now will have a locker mirror I can swipe?